If You Give an Italian a Horn

If you give an Italian a horn, he will want to use it.

He will want to hear its loud blaring sound echo through the congested streets and traffic filled areas.

He will like the sound so much it will remind him of how he likes to honk it impatiently at stop lights. He knows perfectly well the light will not change, but perhaps the car in front can inch just a little farther forward.

Honking the horn at a non-responsive stoplight will remind him how much fun it is to honk at pedestrians.

If he was to stop for pedestrians crossing the road he will honk at them, encouraging them to hurry up. The loud echo of his horn will resonate in the ears of all the pedestrians and all the other people not crossing. It will remind them that stepping off the sidewalk is a perilous feat.

The nervous pedestrians will remind him of the power of his horn. It will remind him of the pleasure he takes in blaring it at drivers who are too slow, or in the his way.

He likes the sounds so much, he will take a drive in the hills. He will drive excessively fast on the perilous, nearly one-way, winding, blind-curved roads. While in the hills, he will use the sweet sound of his horn to alert other drivers to his presence.

He rejoices in the thought of blaring his horn at every turn right before careening around it. He constantly expects his horn to overpower the horns of other drivers coming towards him. Their response will remind him to slow, but he will not forget to respond again, showing his desire to go first.

The horn is music to his ears and he will play it any chance he makes.

Thus, the congested city streets and narrow, winding country roads are filled with a beeping and honking symphony of Italian car horns.